With that said, it can be overwhelming, especially for women. You have to stay on top of it or it will really get out of hand and then you won't know where to start. You are getting daily emails of your matches but then may be receiving personal emails from guys who already have an interest. Then if you follow the progression the sites suggest you are emailing back and forth for a while so it can become alot quickly if you don't keep up with it. So you kind of have to look at it like looking for a job and commit time every day for "dating".
The whole matching process still baffles me. eHarmony is probably the most well-known for their required in-depth personality survey which is supposed to help the matching process. I'm not really buying it as I received a match once whose occupation was "Street Pharmacist". For those of you who haven't put two and two together yet, let me translate. Drug Dealer. Uh yeah, how did you let that one slip through the cracks EH? I met a lot of guys but not of the quality I was hoping and didn't feel that the very complicated matching process they apparently have was helpful to me.
I feel Men need a little help building their profiles as here are some observations I made during my time online:
- If you want to avoid being confused with someone on Dateline's: To Catch a Predator then don't take a creepy cell phone picture of you not smiling in your bathroom mirror. This look does not help you.
- A personal choice of mine, but avoid wearing bedazzled shirts, jeans, shoes, belts, hats. Let's just say avoid the bedazzler. Thanks, but no thanks.
- Per #2, if you have on an Affliction or Ed Hardy shirt in any of your pictures I'm out. Sorry, but Mike "The Situation" of Jersey Shore took me over the edge on this one. Can't do it guys.
- Let's talk photos. I want to know what YOU look like - not your friends or the scenery from your last trip. Therefore, if all of your pictures are of groups of guys then I have to play my own game of "Where's Waldo" to figure out which one you are. Not fun fellas. Get some solo shots.
- The picture with you and your niece/nephew/best friends kid or your grandmother is SO cliche. You don't have to try to sell us that you love kids and grandmas. It's too much. Dial it down.
- If my profile states that I'm looking for someone between 30-40 with no kids then please don't email me if you are a 47 year-old father of four. Stick to the profile please.
- If all of your hobbies and interests deal with sci-fi or fantasy then I'm probably not your girl. Perhaps there is a Lord Of The Rings inspired online dating site better suited for you? I'm sure there is.
- Follow the process. Use the questions, email and then talk on the phone at least once before agreeing to meet. Ask me sometime about when I didn't phone screen and ended up on the most uncomfortable first date ever. I think the dude was a mute.
- Get creative with your questions. The canned ones are fine but ask what you really want to know. What did they do last weekend? Who is their best friend? When was the last time they saw family? What is on their top 10 played songs on their Ipod? Are they a serial killer? Do they have any weird fetishes?
- Always meet on the first date and make it for drinks. You don't know this person so definitely meet them somewhere neutral and only make it for drinks so if it goes badly you can have one drink and split. Never commit to dinner for a first date.
- Forget the online thing. Remember, you met them online too so they took the plunge as well. Who cares how you met? Just go with it.
- With that said, beware of the guys who are strictly online to fish for girls. You can tell pretty quickly who is there to just meet girls and who is there to meet someone special. Keep your eye out for these guys and avoid if you can.
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